Because I am a Pilates instructor, everyone told me I would bounce back and have my post-baby body back again before I knew it. I had doubts then, but I am officially calling bull s***. I am now ten months postpartum, and while I feel great and fit back into a lot of things I used to wear, I do NOT have the same body that I used to. I wish I could say that I love my wider hips and bigger boobs, but that would be a lie. In reality, I am constantly working on loving my mom bod and giving myself grace.
During pregnancy, I ate healthy and worked out until two days before my c-section. I gained around 30-35 lbs and was okay with that. After my c-section, the nurses told me how lucky I was to have my uterus shrinking so quickly, and you could barely tell I had just had a baby. I wish they wouldn't have said that to me. I can remember standing in the hospital bathroom after taking my first shower and being shocked when I looked at myself in the mirror. Before the nurses said I looked great I was expecting to look five months pregnant, but after all that talk, I had started to create a false image in my head and was not prepared for what I saw.
For the first five weeks after having Wyatt, it hurt to stand up, laugh, cough, cry, go to the bathroom, and perform typical daily tasks. But, slowly, I started to heal and began to get excited to get back to working out not just to lose the baby weight but for my mental and emotional health as well. During that time, I avoided my old clothes, so I didn't discourage myself and focused on eating healthy and getting as much rest as I could.
I was "cleared" to exercise again at six weeks postpartum but knew I wasn't fully healed, so I started slowly by taking long walks and doing short, 10-15 minute workouts. Gradually I began to increase the intensity and length of my workouts. It wasn't until five months postpartum that I started to feel like myself during workouts. Now, I am ten months postpartum I feel like I am back to myself and I am doing almost everything I was before.Trying to get workouts in and take care of a baby is hard. There are some days it happens and other days I have to be okay with going on a walk. I am learning more so than ever; that balance is key.
I tell my Pilates clients that whether you had a baby three months or three years ago, you still had a baby, and your body isn't the same after that, so give yourself grace, but I have had a tough time taking my advice. I love my body for giving me Wyatt, and while I couldn't have him vaginally, something I still struggle with, I would be lying if I said I didn't miss my abs and that I like the way that I fill out my tops now. Each day is different; every day, I am working on loving my mom body, practicing gratitude, and trying to work out and eat right. If you are struggling with loving your postpartum body, know that it is okay if you don't like all your mom-curves or the stretch marks. Try to talk to yourself positively, workout when you can, eat well, wear clothes that you feel confident in, and give yourself time. It is okay if the weight doesn't fall off quickly, or the self-love does not come right away.
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